Moving on from a breakup is a difficult process. Following the shock of the initial separation are feelings of anger, sadness, and grief that is often crippling and mind numbing. The pain of a breakup is so profound that it sometimes leaves us not knowing what to do next.
Though there are no one pill medicine to soothe out a broken heart, there are certain ways that will help you move on and heal faster.
Here are 10 ways to help you deal with heartbreak
1. Steer clear and keep distance.
After the initial shock of the breakup, and on occasions the somewhat empty promise to remain friends. It is important to remember to distance yourself from them. No communication whatsoever including calls, texts and IM’s. Even contact with the same friends or families should be avoided. It doesn’t mean that you have to avoid them forever, but it is important to keep the away for a while in order for you to heal your heart and move on.
2. Surround yourself with friends or people.
When hurting, it is easy to distance yourself from others and just sleep the pain away. You begin to question your self-worth. Are you really good enough? However, it is important that you surround yourself with positivity and people who support you fully. Not only will this help you in moving on from your ex but it will also be good for your bruised ego as it reinforces your self-concept and rebuilds your self-worth.
3.Control your anger.
People deal with anger differently. Some people deal with it with grace and passiveness that epitomizes maturity. There are also people who would burn closets worth of clothes, destroy furniture and memorabilia, cut out and shred album after album of photos, lash out at friends who mentions something triggering and on occasions, come up to their ex and make a scene.
It is important to find a way to deal with the anger of a breakup. Some can easily fall the deep end and resort to alcohol and drugs. One healthy way of coping is to try and write a journal of everything negative in the relationship. This way, not only are you letting your hidden frustrations and anger out, it can also help justify the reasons why the breakup happened in the first place.
4.Let it hurt and endure it. Its normal.
It’s a natural reaction to push everything down and pretend that nothing happened. Because whether we like it or not, the world doesn’t stop if we are hurt. After a breakup, it is important to remember that as humans, we feel. The anger, the pain, the confusion, the frustration and the worry that you are not enough and you may never be happy again.
5. Talk it out.
Many people are capable of bouncing back from a breakup on their own. But this isn’t possible for most. Some people have trouble coping with their emotions and will need someone to talk to. It can be a parent, a friend or in most cases, a therapist.
While it is painful, talking about the relationship and the realizations after the relationship is quite helpful in sorting out emotions. If you are having trouble coping and feel that you are depressed, seek help immediately.
6. Sit back and reflect on everything.
Thinking of the reasons why the relationship failed can help you realize mistakes you probably made and help you understand where and why the relationship did not work out. This can also help to avoid making the same mistakes in future relationships.
7. Go out and have fun.
Sometimes, it is easy to forget that there is a whole world outside of our own. While breakups suck, and feels like it’s the end of the world, it is important to not let yourself be eaten by the negativity of it.
Eat meals with your family. Go and hang out with friends, Jog around.
8. Stand by your decision.
Regardless if it was you or them that chose to end the relationship, it is important to stand by the breakup and respect the decision to separate. It is easy to focus on the good side of the relationship and completely dismiss the negative side. However, it is the balance of looking at the relationship with objective eyes that help rationalize the breakup. Cherish the good moments you had with each other. Learn from the painful mistakes you did together. Accept the situation and move forward with your life. Greater things wait for those who strive.
Remember, a broken heart is a painful ordeal that affects us at one time or another. It is perfectly normal to cry, mope and feel depressed about it. However, one must always remember that there is always a rainbow after the rain. That even though it feels like the wold around you is collapsing to destruction, its just a part of life. Each heartbreak is a chance to learn more about yourself and how you deal with it.